Tuesday, November 18, 2008

87 Degrees? You've got to be kidding me.

I didn't want a vent to show up in such early stages of this blog. But seriously...it's November 18th. NOVEMBER 18th. And 87 degrees today? C'mon. We're breaking a record that was set when Truman was President. Hence, the rather unfortunate appropriate name of my blog. Everyone knows how much I DETEST this climate - for many reasons other than that it's too warm and sunny 99% of the time (or it feels like it's 99% of the time). But reasons like this when it's not supposed to be warm. Even when the summer does go away, IT DOESN'T. And here is proof. And I'm sorry, it's bad enough that Christmas music is smothered upon us the day after Halloween (can anyone say, OVERKILL?), but there is something wrong - terribly wrong - with it being thrusted upon us against our will when you still have to RUN THE AIR CONDITIONING in your car! And can we PLEASE have Thanksgiving before the Christmas nuttiness starts? I mean, I haven't taken down my creepy spider skeleton yet.

Other reasons why this NOVEMBER heat is frustrating:

1. It's one less day of "relief" from the heat before we have to brace ourselves for another summer.
Okay, any day in the 80s during the summer would be heaven, but it's NOVEMBER. Not September.

2. It's one less day of enjoying the period of the earth's rotation when
technically the tilt away from the sun is saying we're in the Autumn/Winter phase. Did someone not get the memo?

3. It's one less day of "feeling" like it's almost Thanksgiving. It's hard to go to Fry's and order our Thanksgiving dinner for next week (yeah, like I'm gonna cook it myself...) when a guy wearing a tank top showing his hairy back walked into the store in front of me. Hey, cooler weather means hairier people tend to cover up more.
That hair isn't a good winter coat, even though it looks like it is.

4. People that live here that aren't from here that
love the heat. Gee, if I moved to Seattle and complained every time the sun came out, I would probably be shot. So when it does get cold and rainy here (for all of 5 minutes), please shut up. It's our "rare" pleasure, like the sunlight is in Seattle.5. One less day of enjoying winter/cooler type clothing. Scarves...jackets...skirts and tall boots...the best fashion is the Fall/Winter fashion. And not just because it covers hairy backs and exposed boobs and buttcracks.

6. The warmer, the more headachy and sick to my stomach I feel. And I think I have over-active sweat glands.
7. The heat brings more of those annoying people moving in this direction. It's bad enough that they come here 6 months out of year (and I'm jealous they get the luxury of living here without staying for the summer. Wusses), but then they tell their children about it and their kids move here with their kids. And their kids have more kids. Crowds generate more body heat. All that body heat makes more Wal-Marts, I mean Wal-Trash, get built because they complain it's too hot to drive 3 extra miles to the already existing Wal-Trash to get their Cheetos and Twinkies so they can sit on their butts and watch crap on the CW network.8. This heat has the insult to injury factor of more concrete slabs going down to build more Wal-Trash. It's a desert, people. Can we stop stretching it to it's limit? Asphalt and concrete ABSORBS more heat. We have enough heat. Yet the Wal-Trash and cookie cutter developments bring more of it. At least this cruddy Recession we're in is slowing down the unnecessary growth. I'll stop there for now. But there is more.

9. I still see the occasional cockroach, due to the heat. Funny, in real life they're not as cute as the one in WALL-E (same goes for rats in Ratatouille. Okay, I haven't seen any RATS, but we do have a mouse in the garage. At least, I hope it's only one mouse).

Okay, okay. Of course that's not it with my cranky vent list. But now here is the bright side:

1. 70s are predicted in a few days. Sure, that's not as good as 50s and 60s, but it's a start!

2. We're going to be up in Pinetop/Lakeside for Thanksgiving. Probably no snow, but much cooler more SEASONAL air and *gasp* pine trees and more of the color green. My kids deserve to see green more. It's no fair that they only get to see green in nature on TV and in their crayon box.


  1. It's been rather warm up my way the last few days, too. Al Gore must be right. :)

  2. You crack me up....Don't yell at me, but for November in Idaho it is alittle on the warm side too, it has been weird. I am happy to hear that you guys get to go to the mountains for THanksgiving:)