Thursday, September 25, 2014

What Sleeps in Vegas Looks Drunk...

Apparently if you're passed out on a couch in the event/conference areas of a hotel-casino in Vegas, it may give the wrong impression. 

Chris went up to Vegas to help out at a water conference. He brought me along and we farmed out our three children for the 48 hours we would be gone. 

There were numerous classes in the ballroom/event areas of the hotel and we had to help scan people in and out of their scheduled classes. Because there was a casino and other fun stuff, it's important to do the scanning at the beginning and the end so everyone attends the class/lecture that their respective employers are paying them to attend. Otherwise, some of these boneheads would try to sneak out and head to the casino.

Can I just say that some of these ADULT conference attendees are just as bad as whiny children? If we were waiting to scan them out until the official end of the class AND for the speaker to be finished, we were still met by a few complainers at the door demanding to be scanned out. And if a class across the hall was already scanned and dismissed, we got the, "but they got out already..."  

This is the sort of thing I ran into in my various years of teaching kids! But these were adults! And mostly men.

Because the majority of the attendees were males, it was quite refreshing to see a long line of men extending out of their restroom after class while we women just walked right on in to ours. I never thought I'd see the day. 

ANYWAY...but I was supposed to talk about how I screwed up. Chris brought me on this trip because I've been quite stressed and frustrated lately. The combination of various recent factors and motherhood
dynamics have had things in a perfect storm. It was time to check out of all of that for a day or so.

Well, just because I escaped from the house and the typical day to day madness, it didn't mean I still wasn't exhausted. Chris and I arrived at the hotel late Monday night and we had to be down in the Conference area by 6am the next morning to start helping out with the classes and make sure we knew what to do when it came to scanning people in and out of class.

Well, after I helped scan in the first group of class attendees, I figured it was fine to just lie down on the nice plush sofa right by that particular event room where the class was held. Well, I must have been really tired because I was GONE. I don't sleep in public well - if at all. I think the last time I was able to just zonk out like that in a public place was in college. But not this time.

I guess that sofa was really comfortable.

Well, if these conferences can have a lot of partying going on in the casinos and bars (hence why people have to be scanned in and out, like I mentioned already) and then someone is passed out on the couch the next morning at the conference, it doesn't say, "Exhausted Mom..." 

It says, "Drunk chick."

So yeah, I woke up to Chris patting my tush going, "Jill, you need to get up! People think you're drunk....!"

It didn't matter that I was as sober as a newborn at LDS General Conference. The perception was there. 

Oh yeah, and it probably didn't help that I was wearing the water event shirt as well. 

Artwork I worked on at the conference...instead of sleeping...
Oh, and get this. So while I was passed out on the couch, some guy came out of the lecture room and hurled all over the floor about 10 feet away from me. Chris got the privilege of witnessing that event. That's another sign I was in a deep sleep. I would not have remained on the couch near a puke incident if I was aware of it. 

Chris said, due to the perception of my perceived drunkeness: "Passed out hot chick (his words, not mine) and puke right do the math..."

Just before the show started...
All in all, it was a nice trip. A little too quick. And for as comfortable as that hotel bed was, getting up early wasn't pleasant. But for those two nights, it was probably the first time in a long time that I slept straight through once my head hit the pillow.  

And the night before we left, we went up to the MGM and attended Brad Garrett's Comedy Club. We loved the comic Vargus Mason. He wasn't the headliner, but he should have been. Sure, the headliner was funny, but he felt that he had to be overly disgusting. Vargus Mason had
his moments, but we enjoyed him so much more. And Chris bought his DVD afterwards. Vargus asked him who to write it out to. Chris said to write it to Jill. 

Well, I love Vargus even more because he wrote, "Dear Jill, Stay Beautiful!" 

That's something an exhausted sober mom needed to read.

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